Walking on Water

(This is a repost from my old Multiply site.)
 
I took my time reading John Ortberg’s book, If You Want to Walk on Water, You’ve Got to Get Out of the Boat.  I can read some books in just a few days but I took four months to read this one.  And not because it was boring.  It took me a while to read it because it freaked me out and I just knew it’s what God’s doing in my life now—it’s time to walk on water! 

There were many times when I just had to put the book down, and I even tried to put it back on the shelf, because it was convicting me too much and spoke too much about my own situation. But I finally finished it, and here are some nuggets from the book and my thoughts on his thoughts . . .

In water-walking, there’s always a call.  “God asks an ordinary person to engage in an act of extraordinary trust, that of getting out of the boat.”  Don’t try to do it if God hasn’t called you to—because courage should definitely be coupled by wisdom and discernment.

Aside from the call, there’s always fear.  “God has an inextinguishable habit of asking people to do things that are scary to them.”  But think of the worst thing that can happen if you try, and hopefully you’ll see it’s not so bad after all.  “Failing” or your exaggerated version of what could happen if you screw up is not as bad as staying on the boat when you’re supposed to get out!  Besides, “there is no guarantee that life in the boat is going to be any safer.”  And after that experience, even though Peter did sink a bit, he was still the only one of the disciples who actually did the unthinkable and unexplainable.

We fight the fear with a reassurance of God’s presence, and the decisions that follow will help us to never be the same.  Water-walking will surely change our lives.  When we choose comfort over risk, it becomes a habit and what’s worse, if we don’t heed God’s voice, we will not be doing what He has called us to do.  It’s not worth staying in the boat and miss out on the growth, challenges and opportunities that could come your way if you take a risk and follow God.

The single most striking in Ortberg’s book for sentence me is this: “Unrealized potential is a sin.” He goes on to explain, “Imagine watching all that God might have done with your life if you had let Him.”  I put the book down at that moment and made a decision to live my life—this one life I have to live—the way God wants me to, and if that means new challenges and risks, so be it!

The book has so many more principles that will help you get out of your comfort zone.  For me, the past few months have been some of the most exciting but scary times.  And the challenge continues—I will finally try my hand at teaching in a few weeks and let’s see how that turns out too! 

Thanks so much to my family, friends and mentors who encouraged me, prayed for me and stood with me at this time.  Walking on water is much more fun with a boatful of friends egging me on . . .

But let me egg you on a bit too—what about you—is there an area of your life that maybe God’s calling you to get out of the boat?  What’s holding you back from walking on water and encountering Jesus like never before?

If I were you, I’d try walking on water—there’s nothing like trusting God and experiencing all He has for you!

Hannah's Journey

I haven't blogged anything personal lately (I've been trying to be more consistent blogging here), but I thought I would share some thoughts about Hannah's journey as she asked God for a child and how she responded to that miracle.

• Elkanah was a man who was faithful to the Lord (1 Samuel 1:3 says, "Year after year this man went up from his town to worship and sacrifice to the Lord Almighty . . .") and he loved his wife. I'm not sure why he needed two (I wouldn't want to be the envious and unloved wife!), but he loved Hannah dearly. (1 Samuel 1:5 says, "But to Hannah he gave a double portion because he loved her, and the Lord had closed her womb.")
• I don't understand why the Lord had closed Hannah's womb, but I do know that Hannah's anguish and pain led to a great miracle--after many, many years of waiting, wondering, hoping, getting frustrated, and praying. Hannah's sore spot led her to see God demonstrate His great power in her life. It did not make her bitter, even when she had to wait for so long. Hannah's example of great faith and patience is so commendable!
• We all have a tendency to focus on the one thing we don't have--whether that's a job, husband, child, home, or anything that we know is not inherently bad, but we still fixate on. God never reprimanded Hannah for her desire to have a child, but through Elkanah's statement in 1 Samuel 1:8 ("Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don't you eat? Why are you downhearted? Don't I mean more to you than ten sons?"), He reminds us that we need to appreciate what we do have, even while we wait for what we want. Hannah did not have a son yet, but she did have a loving husband who sought to understand and care for her.  
• Hannah's relationship with God was deeply personal. She did not approach God with a facade of having it all together. Rather, she made everything painfully plain and strikingly honest. "In bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the Lord" (1 Samuel 1:10). She also told Eli, "I was pouring out my soul to the Lord" (1 Samuel 1:15). Notice that God never held the bitterness of Hannah's soul against her. When we are tempted to keep up appearances, we may look good but we could actually be wasting away inside. God listens and He cares, and Hannah knew that. Hannah did not keep up appearances just so that people wouldn't talk about her--she cared more about being honest with God and pleading for her miracle. She asked, and she asked boldly.
• Eli blessed Hannah with peace, and when she went away she was no longer sad (1 Samuel 1:17,18 says: "Eli answered, 'Go in peace, and may the God of Israel grant you what you have asked of him.' She said, 'May your servant find favor in your eyes.' Then she went her way and ate something, and her face was no longer downcast.") The Message version even says that Hannah's face was radiant after she prayed. God's peace came before Hannah's circumstances changed and before her situation was resolved. Was Hannah already pregnant? No. Did she really know God was going to answer her prayer and give her a son? No. Then why the peace? Our human minds can't explain this, but God gives peace that transcends situations, emotions, and questions. One of the greatest blessings in trials and challenges is knowing that God's grace and peace is abundant and He carries you through those circumstances. 
• God always comes through. He came through for Hannah, and He will come through for us according to His purpose and will, and in His perfect timing. The Message version of 1 Samuel 1:19 says, "And God began making the necessary arrangements in response to what she had said." Hannah was persistent to ask, and God was faithful to answer.
• I love how Hannah glorified God when He answered her prayers. Often times, we forget God's hand when we see God's gift, but Hannah did not. She shared God's faithfulness to her to Eli and she reaffirmed her confidence, trust, and faith in God (1 Samuel 1:26-2:10). 

Hannah's journey was difficult, but she never gave up. I pray the same for us, that we will wait to see God fulfill every promise He has made to us, because He is faithful and He will do it!

Moving from Personal to Professional

I will be posting more regularly on my new site--varshadaswani.com. The blog will focus on communication, writing, training, and language development. I will try to post personal blogs here from time to time, but will work on developing consistency on the new site.

Please check out my posts there! Thank you so much. God bless you and keep you!

Laughing with Each Other

There are a lot of things I've learned from my friends throughout the years, but one of them stands out.

We've been able to laugh with each other and enjoy the different seasons God has blessed us with--

From here, in 2004: 

To here, in 2012:

 

"A sense of humor... is needed armor. Joy in one's heart and some laughter on one's lips is a sign that the person down deep has a pretty good grasp of life." - Hugh Sidey (journalist)

So here's to more laughter in the many, many years to come!

Christianity can't be Compartmentalized

We can compartmentalize lots of things in our lives, like books, hobbies, and conversations, but faith is not meant to be compartmentalized. It should affect everything we think, say, and do. If I am a Christian and think like a Christian only when I'm with Christian people, that's not who I really am. It's easier to keep "the faith stuff" in the church box, but real, authentic, life-giving faith bleeds into and affects every area of life.

This includes:

• what you read
• what you say 
• how you respond to irritating and annoying situations/people
• how you spend your time 
• what you think of others (even when they won't find out what you're thinking)

We would never be able to walk this out on our own. Left to ourselves, we compartmentalize because that's the best we can do. But when we realize that our best will never be enough and trust God to work in us, we'll realize that it is possible for our faith to affect everything we do! By God's grace!

On The Avengers: Commonality is Overrated

I enjoyed watching The Avengers, amidst all the hype. Sometimes movies that are too hyped up disappoint, but I'm glad this one didn't. I especially enjoyed the consistency in script from Ironman to The Avengers (I didn't get to see Hulk so I can't include that), and I also loved the humor, even in challenging scenes in the film.

My takeaway from the film is that commonality is thoroughly overrated, and The Avengers exemplifies that. They were really a bunch of unbalanced heroes who had lots of personal issues, but they did not have to be like each other--or even like each other--to work together.

It would have been a sucky film if they all had to change their costumes or become more like each other to succeed. One of my hesitations before watching the film was how the makers would bring together the vintage-ness of Captain America, the narcissism and technological advancements of Ironman, and the sentiments and other-worldliness of Thor. And The Avengers did not disappoint because the strengths of each hero were still evident in the team.

Ironman's edgy and narcissistic personality were his very own, and he didn't have to give that up to succeed. If the other heroes had to all become like Captain America, that would have been boring! Hulk's anger management issues were endearing, but not if everyone was like him. Thor's sentiments towards his brother could have made them all lose, and good thing there's only one Thor. And then of course there are the individual strengths of Black Widow and Hawkeye, and even Nick Fury.

The only things they had in common were their desire to protect the human race and to defeat Loki. And that was enough to bring them together and win.

I look at my friends in church and how we work together--not because we are like each other or even like each other all the time--but we're brought together because we love Jesus and want to make Him known. Common personalities, desires and perspectives are somehow overrated. The goal is what matters more, and that's what brings people together.

I liked the film so much that I think I want to watch it again! Did you like the film? Why or why not?

When it's summer but you're not at the beach . . .

. . . stare at these photographs, close your eyes, and imagine the sand under your feet!

SUMMER. It's more fun in the Philippines :-)

Lessons from a Freelancer

Being a freelancer is fun, so I've discovered! I'm not teaching this summer, and I am focusing mainly on my writing and training projects for the next few months. Here are some of the things I've learned about freelancing:

• Look for work. I'm strategizing how to "sell" what I do in the most simple but effective way, even if I don't particularly enjoy the business side of things. Ask people you work with how you can help or what you can do to get more jobs.
• Be efficient in replying to calls, emails and texts. Who wants to work with someone who forgets to call you back?
• Keep a notebook handy. When the ideas flow, write them down. 
• Be organized. Remember clients' names, numbers and details. Write the details down in that notebook!
• Be open. Don't just do what you've always done. As a freelancer, you will have to learn to do different things and you'll have to keep your options open. Enjoy the new experiences!
• Get out of the house. Sometimes I love working from home (because I don't have to force myself to wake up very early or spend money for food and transpo) but sometimes you just have to get out of the house to get things done.
• Keep the client's best interest in mind. Don't get greedy with the project cost. Otherwise you won't just lose the project--you may lose the client! Try to work within the client's budget.
• Be in faith. As a freelancer, I've learned to trust God more for my finances since I don't always have a check coming on the 15th and the 30th. 
• Grow thyself. Research, learn, absorb, ask questions . . .
• Follow deadlines and make personal, internal, early deadlines so you're never late for a meeting or for submitting a document. Never over-promise and under-deliver.
• Work hard and play hard! Keep the Sabbath holy. Rest and get enough sleep every day. 
• Use your talents to draw people to God. Work is not just a job--it's always an avenue to help others know Him. 
• Pray! God grants favor to His children, and I've seen so many instances in the last few months where I didn't do anything to get a project or make new contacts. God even works out the timing for my projects so I'm not overloaded with them at any given time. 

If you told me a few years ago that I would be a freelance writer, trainer and teacher, I would have laughed at you or gotten really nervous about the money . . . But God gave me the grace to obey when He called me to walk out of the boat, and I'm so glad I did! :-)


But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” 
“Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”
“Come,” he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. - Matthew 14:27-29

Notes: Friendship with God - The Life of Abraham

I am reviewing Pastor Jim Laffoon's Friendship with God series, and I would like to share my notes with you:

Jim Laffoon « Friendship with God: The Life of Abraham

THE POSSIBILITY OF FRIENDSHIP

« Friendship with God is a quest you grow in, and it's possible for every believer. It's not about your gift mix.

« Can we know God in a deep place that touches our soul? Only intimacy with God can really satisfy us.

« The condition for friendship with God is obedience.

You walk behind God, you walk with God, and then you can walk before God.

3 Stages

1. Imperative

« motivated to know God by destiny or desperation

« If you don't get a vision of destiny, you'll get it by desperation.

« He calls you to His side when you've settled the issue of Lordship. You can't get the benefits of intimacy without the foundation of Lordship.

2. Intimacy

3. Inspiration

« He will then send you out.

PRINCIPLES OF FRIENDSHIP WITH GOD

1. The Place of Friendship

« An altar is the foundation of your friendship with God.

« When you attempt to have friendship with God, you will face giants in the land like never before.

« The enemy will do everything it takes to keep you out of God's Word.

2. The Principles of Friendship

« Friendship with God is inconvenient. God wants to see what kind of heart you really have. God will test you if you love Him at all times.

« God wants to draw you beyond your need into friendship with Him. Friendship with God is not about a need being met. It's about knowing Him. God is waiting outside the normalcy of your life waiting to see if you'll beckon to Him. Abraham knew God so well that he recognized Him. Ask God what’s on His mind and His heart. How can you bless Him? Abraham just wanted to serve God and make Him comfortable.

3. The Products of Friendship

« When you build God a resting place in your life, things happen. God knows your heart. There are moments with God you will never have again. Don’t miss that moment when He chooses to interact with us.

« Abraham had a need he did not even know about—Sarah was in unbelief. God will touch needs in your life you didn’t know you had. There is a power in friendship with God.

« God was testing Abraham to see if He could draw Abraham outside his need. God couldn’t get rid of Abraham—Abraham wanted God more than anything else.  

« Friendship with God may make you bold, but it shouldn’t make you arrogant. He is still God, not you.

« You’ve touched friendship with God when you stay with Him beyond your needs—when you want Him more than anything else.

Not about me . . .

Many people wonder why I've served in the youth ministry for the last eleven years since college graduation. Personally, I love meeting and growing with young people so much that it's really been a no-brainer for me. Leading, teaching, volunteering, hanging out, challenging, correcting, empowering . . . These are some of the things I love to do with the girls in my small group.

But even with the passion for the youth and a heart to see them grow, because of all the transitions I've been through in the last few years, I've sometimes wondered if what I do makes a difference.

Today I was reminded of how it's not about me. Paul said one plants, another waters, but God causes the growth. I may have done One 2 One with someone many years ago, I may have played a part in someone's spiritual growth, I may be available to challenge a person to grow in God, but it's still not about me. God brings the growth. We have to be faithful to plant or water, to do what we can at any particular time, and we also have to build foundations correctly, not on ourselves or the church, but on the foundation of Jesus Christ alone.

I don't see myself graduating from youth ministry yet--for as long as God wants me to plant and water here, I will. I love how life has greater meaning when we pour into others, rather than just looking into our own lives. Because remember, it's not about me, and it's not about you either . . . !

"I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow. So neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow. The one who plants and the one who waters have one purpose, and they will each be rewarded according to their own labor. For we are co-workers in God’s service; you are God’s field, God’s building.  By the grace God has given me, I laid a foundation as a wise builder, and someone else is building on it. But each one should build with care. For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ." - 1 Corinthians 3:6-11 

Wisdom Calls for a Shift

I’ve seen dozens of my friends get married in the past years, and I’ve subconsciously discovered something that I would consciously like to share with you now.

When one of my friends is about to get married, I’ve discovered that wisdom calls for a shift. If in the past, the groom was more of a closer friend to me than the bride, things naturally shift for me because now the bride will be my friend more than the groom. Even if I don’t know her that well or if we’re not that close, even if both the bride and the groom are my friends, wisdom calls for a shift.

Seeing my friends get married is always a privilege, and I love being part of their journey—whether it’s through a bridal shower, a developing friendship, or their experiences after the wedding, but as a single woman who has married friends, I have to be careful to protect my friends’ marriages and know my place in any friendship.

Through the course of their engagement and of course during their married life, my primary contact with the bride and groom becomes the bride, my primary friend is the bride, and my confidante (if I need to choose between the two of them) is the bride. It’s not that I’ll never talk to the groom, but there’s just a natural and appropriate shift that allows the bride and groom to flourish among themselves and allows me to enjoy my growing friendship with the bride. And that’s just right.

Marriage seems challenging as it is—and there’s no reason for anyone else to unintentionally stick her foot in the door. I’ve gained many new friends who became the brides of good friends, and I’ve enjoyed getting to know each one of them. I’ve also met the wives of the men I’ve had to work with, and when anything personal comes up, I’ve learned to talk to the wives, not the men.

If wisdom calls for a shift, let’s shift with it, celebrating the life and blessings God has given us, and honoring Him with what we do and who we are.

Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise . . . - Ephesians 5:15

Forty Years Ago . . .

On April 7, 1972, my dad and mom got married. I’ve decided to go down memory lane and share with you an excerpt of what I’m giving them for their anniversary—our Top 40 Family Moments. Our family is not perfect but God is so faithful!  

1.     How Papa and Mama met—The stories about the handkerchief, interview and list of requirements are classics in our family.

2.     Their wedding reception at the Taj Mahal Hotel in Mumbai. Papa was wondering why his three kids didn’t show up. Now he wants to have another reception just for our family.

3.     Their firstborn

4.     Their second son

5.     Their only daughter

6.     Memories of the Paco house, memories of Baguio trips (tea and boiled eggs for the road, picture or real, counting cows, champuy, Park Hotel, corn soup, Burnham park) and Mama’s trip with the kids to India (my chin, ouch!)

7.     Growing up with our neighbors in our Valle 1 house and Bhaoo’s maasti with the neighbors; getting locked up in Green Valley and memories Valle Verde Country Club (swimming, tennis, barbecue, iced tea), racing with Nato and Greg to La Salle and then having lunch sent to school every day; Big Daddy and Big Mummy; our cousins (Bhaoo’s maasti with Priya, Aarti, Gopal, and especially Govind)

8.     Mama’s trip to India with Bhaya and me, and then Hong Kong with us kids (overweight bags, trains, buses, not having enough money to pay for a cab to get back to the hotel, buying Tags, Cole Haans and Giordano stuff)

9.     The weddings (two) and the grandchildren (four)

10. Trips to America, India, Hong Kong, Singapore and stints in America

I love my family and I see God’s faithfulness over us every single day :-) 

And there are lots more memories to make. The best is yet to come!

Happy anniversary, Papa and Mama! I love you :-) 

Mixed Feelings about The Hunger Games

I just watched The Hunger Games, and I can't seem to decide what I feel and think about it. First of all, I'm glad I watched it without knowing much of the story. It's also really well made and very compelling.

But the premise of the film is that we take advantage of young people for our own benefit and entertainment, and that just does not sit well with me. Targeting the 12-18 age bracket and putting them in harmful and hurtful situations just so people can be entertained is sick--and yet the movie portrays this so well that I enjoyed seeing how the story progressed. I don't recommend it for children or young teens, actually, and I was saddened by several parts of the film.

But I liked Katniss's character so much simply because she showed a depth of character even in the worst situations. She reflected courage, perseverance and values that only grew stronger with every challenge.

So yes--I really do have mixed feelings about the film. I'm glad I watched it and I'm glad I know what it's about, but I don't really want to read the books. The underlying theme of sacrificing for the sake of others' entertainment was just too twisted. I think the highlight for me was watching it with two of my best friends in the world!

Last Day of Classes

I love being a teacher because every semester is different. The students are different, the challenges are new and the tasks are overwhelmingly fun. Today's the last day of classes for this semester and I know I will miss seeing my students three times a week, their expressions when I tell them they have a quiz, and the fun we all have in class.

Here are some of the things I've learned over the last few semesters of teaching:

- Work smart. Don't spend too many hours checking papers or planning the lesson. Do your tasks efficiently and quickly. And don't let the papers pile up! First in, first out policy should apply as much as possible.

- Be on your toes with the students. Bring an extra dose of excitement and energy to class.

- Discern between honesty and "bola" (some students tell the teacher what she wants to hear to get a better grade). 

- Expect the best from them. Challenge them to do better.

- Enjoy each day! 

"They may forget what you said but they will never forget how you made them feel." - Carol Buchner

Communication Skills

Sometimes we think that basic communication skills apply to kids only--listening, speaking, reading and writing. But these basic skills actually become the foundation for life-long learning. Developing in one is connected to developing in the other, and we can't choose one over the other.

I was talking with a friend today and he was asking how he could become a better speaker. Part of my response was to develop the three other communication skills as well, placing special emphasis on listening. A good speaker has to listen to what is being said--and sometimes to what is not being said. In the same way, writing is developed through reading and good writers should be good readers.

Skills are learned, so don't worry if you feel intimidated by the idea of communicating well. Sometimes the only hindrance to this development is ourselves--if you're ready to learn and how much time and effort you're willing to devote to the task. But don't forget--you can improve and you don't need the world's most expensive materials to do so.

Take Home from the Singles' Getaway

Due to insistent public demand and a personal desire to review my notes from the Singles' Getaway, here are some of my main takeaway lessons. The sessions were about what singles like, want and need, but my notes are divided into different categories. Hope you learn something new or are reminded of something you need to hear today!

On Loving God 

• Instead of serving Jesus, why do we ask Him to serve us? We should serve God and His purpose! 
• Chase the things of God. You never know where it will lead you.
• Before doing something, try asking if it's a good idea or a GOD idea.
• Jesus is looking for followers, not fans.
• Relationships will fail me. I will always need God, and He will lead me to a place where I will not be in want.
• Do whatever it takes to grow in your walk with God.
• My heavenly Father has my back and He wants what's best for me.
• I am not the hero of my own story. That is a recipe for disaster. When our lives are centered around us, we will miss God. 
• Everything - Jesus = Nothing BUT Jesus + Nothing = Everything 
• The thrill of my life is not getting a husband. There's more to life than that. Don't take Jesus out of your life midway. 
• "Our hearts are restless until we rest in Christ." - St. Augustine 
• I can't live a day apart from the grace of God. The same grace that saved me sustains me every day.
• My sufficiency is found in Christ alone. Pride says we need to add something to Jesus, but let's not be foolish. 
• Daily Christian living is daily Christian dying. 
• The goal of the Bible is not to make bad people good. It makes dead people live. 
• I'm only qualified for the gospel because I'm disqualified. If I think I'm qualified, that disqualifies me. 
• Jesus holds our relationships and everything together. (Colossians 1)
• Be a child of God, rather than following rules. 
• Walk the walk of a woman who is loved by God and knows who she is! 
• I love Jesus more than I will love my future husband. He will be grace and a bonus to me. Don't treat any man like he is Jesus. He can't affirm you and love you unconditionally like Christ. Be secure in Christ and draw everything you need from Him.
• My #1 need is Jesus. 
• I have nothing to prove.
• Because Jesus was strong for me, I am free to be weak. The gospel allows us the freedom to admit we are weak.
• Recalibrate your life. The things you used to value should not matter as much. God should weigh more.

On Celebrating Life and Work

• "Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." - Helen Keller
• Be intentional and deliberate about the life God wants you to live. Don't die while you're still alive. Don't lose the twinkle in your eye ;-)
• Faith is dangerous. Live dangerously. Pursue God and live out His vision for your life!
• Die doing what you love. Do work that really matters.
• Some people live in a cage like in Manila Zoo. But some roam the wild and leave the cage behind. Never underestimate someone who has the courage to come out of the cage and live the life God has called him/her to live. 
• Keep yourself involved in community. 
• "Oh how much larger our life will be if we become smaller in it." - G.K. Chesterton

On Being Secure, Whole, Complete 

• Be the person people want to be around. Be so on fire with God that you don't need to draw from others, and you don't need to be clingy or needy.
• Marriage is about two complete people living under the same roof.
• Marriage is not a solution for the loneliness in you. God is, and He has given us relationships we need to value.
• Do you come into a relationship with a big straw to get everything you can from it? Do you suck the life out of a relationship because you're so needy and insecure and need that other person to be so much more to you?
• "If I don't have this (fill in the blank), life will stop." Is Jesus really the only one you need and want? 

On Emotions and Thoughts

• If you sow emotionally into a relationship, it will bear fruit. You can't see what's boiling in the pot until you take it off the fire. Assess rationally. 
• Whatever you sow your thoughts to, your heart will go to. 
• My heart is the treasure chest of my soul. 
• I need to guard my heart from my heart. Your heart will pretend to you and lie to you. 
• You will face the consequences of your decisions.
• Challenge the patterns in your mind: like men needing a trophy wife or taking too long.

On Relationships

• The desire for relationships comes from God Himself. 
• When God created everything, He said it was all good--except it was not good for man to be alone. And this was before the fall. 
• Single does not have to mean alone. 
• God values relationships. Relationships should be treasured: seek it out, value it, guard and protect it.
• God chose to sovereignly intertwine us in relationships. 
• Treasure the right relationships. Can you tell the difference between the real ones and the fake ones? 
• God is the best foundation for all relationships. As you seek God, you'll come along people who are passionate about God as well. 
• Bad foundations are costly. 
• Value community. Invest time with married women. 
• Ask yourself if your relationships are honoring God and if you are honoring God in your relationships.
• Relationships that have a purpose higher than yourself will grow. Relationships for relationship's sake will end. The relationship itself can't be the only goal. Otherwise you'll just clash into each other.
• What's your focus? Life can't revolve around one person or yourself. Where are you heading? Are you heading the right way? Begin with the end in mind. 
• Walk together. Agree. Walk together. Agree. Walk together. Agree. (Amos 3:3) Then the relationship can get clearer, stronger, deeper.
• Love gives. Lust gets. Love trusts, is willing to be vulnerable, corrects, forgives. 
• There's no perfect relationship because I'm in it!
• An unforgiving heart is an unloving heart. Unforgiveness will crush you. 
• Sooner is better than later! 

On the Differences between Men and Women 

• Guys see things in primary colors. Girls see all the shades and hues, but what we see isn't always what guys see or meant. Plus, most men are color blind. So you'll have to talk about what you see and what it means.
• Be enamored and mystified that men and women are different instead of trying to make them like us, or trying to be like them. 
• Women who try to pursue men are taking away their privilege to lead. Don't just look 5-10 years ahead. Look 30-40 years ahead. 
• If you initiate a little, are you still trusting God? How about fixing your eyes on Jesus instead?  
• Man tends to man up when he has to step up to the plate. 
• Accept the differences and glorify God together. 

Out of the Box

I attended my first singles' getaway this weekend. I remember attending a retreat for singles when I was about to graduate from college, but I've never really been involved in singles events. I had a preconceived notion of singles groups and so I was always just involved with the youth, rather than the singles.

But the past weekend and the fun singles' getaway helped me get out of the box. Without my usual group of friends, without any involvement in the event itself, without any idea of what was going to happen or what the place was like, I joined the getaway.

And I am so glad I did something out of the box. Here are some things I did that I would not normally do:
- I worshiped God 360 degrees. Dawn worship was amazing!
- I group hugged 18 people I don't really know for "All Aboard"
- I coached our team during the pipeline activity
- My teammates passed me through the electric fence and all I could do to help was relax and help the others get through
- I tried to jump rope with my team at the same time and stayed in the game even when it was hard
- I had a great time with "MySpace" - from the cheer to the games and the pics on the last day
- I did a solo jump shot (normal for some, but not really for me!)
- I roomed with people I didn't know
- I "bused" with people I didn't know
- I met people left and right and the atmosphere was so friendly. It was so easy to introduce yourself or begin talking to strangers
- I sang and kinda danced (more like watched people dance) and saw how, yet again, church is fun and real and the best place to be
- I was amazed at the detailed planning of our church staff. Great job!

I still love the youth but now I also love the singles. Sometimes, we limit ourselves to what we know, who we hang out with, where we've been, what we have done, what we think we could do, what we think God can or should do (tsk tsk, this is dangerous!). But who invented that box anyway and why do we have to stay in it? I'm thankful for the opportunity to try many new things and meet many new people and see God in new ways!

SO . . . Would you do something to get out of that box you've made for yourself? If you try, you just might become a better and more fun version of you! :-)

Discoveries and Lessons

Coron, Palawan - postcard-worthy

The past three days in Coron have been amazing, fun and relaxing. We have been able to do so much over the weekend. Here are some random thoughts and a sneak peek into our pictures.

• Maquinit Hot Springs - We saw mangrove trees here, which grow in salt water and sand. It seems unlikely, but they have unique roots that adjust to the environment and let the water flow through them. 
• Mt. Tapyas - We walked up the mountain (all 724++ steps and back). You see better the higher you go, and the final view is worth the trek! Starting strong is great, but finishing strong is the best. Also trust your tour guide. When he suggested leaving the lodge at 5am to see the sunrise on top of the mountain, I had my doubts. But the second I landed on the highest step of the mountain, I saw a tiny bit of sun that made my day. I also had to sing "Faithful God" under my breath.
  

  

  The snippets of the sunrise on the way up Mt. Tapyas
  

• Siete Pecados, Malcapuya Beach and Atwayan Coral Garden - I never realized what a great world lives under our world, but I got a peek because I learnt to snorkel. What a view. I saw corals, fish, sea urchin, clams, and plants. And I'm glad dynamite fishing stopped in Palawan a few years ago so the corals can grow again.
• Cayangan Lake and Blue Lagoon - This area made me appreciate the Philippines even more. God has given us a great, precious land. I even went in a cave inside the lake, thanks to my life vest, friends and reliable guide.
  

  

  The view was worth every step!

• Twin Lagoons - This looked like something out of a movie, with all the limestone and trees growing out of the stone. God can make even trees by/on limestone fruitful and strong!
• Zipping through Coron Island on our banca reminds me of how great God is, how big the world is and how small I am. Have you ever seen how small Coron Island is on the Philippine map? It's probably not even on the map. But it's big. Maps are helpful but we can't replace the real thing. Visit and enjoy the places God has blessed us with!
• Malcapuya Beach - I met the man who

  

  With Lhorris and Charmaine, the mangrove trees are behind us
  

  owns this island. He bought it as a place to retire forty years ago and the beach is so clean, the water is so clear. He has now retired there with his family. My friends and I spent the day lounging and swimming on their beach.
• On friends and vacations - God ordains times of rest and reflection so we can appreciate our life more, grow and do things we have never tried before. I'm grateful for the experiences these past few days and I am looking forward to more vacations with more friends! 

"But God made the earth by his power; 

he founded the world by his wisdom and stretched out the heavens by his understanding." 

Jeremiah 10:12

Be Intentional

Two words have been on my mind the last few months: "BE INTENTIONAL." Having experienced what it's like to move to another continent, having adjusted to a new life there, having moved back home after a year, and having the last few months zip my by as I've adjusted to being home . . . I know I just haven't been the same inside. God has done a greater, more transforming work in me that I just can't explain. And one of the greatest lessons is being intentional.



Being intentional about how I love God

Being intentional about spending time with my family

Being intentional about work, preparation and diligence

Katipunan lunch with Elle & Erika

Being intentional about meeting deadlines and fulfilling responsibilities 

Being intentional about maintaining and growing relationships

Being intentional about speaking the truth in love

Being intentional about making new friends

Being intentional about prayer

Being intentional about trying new things

With super great friends! Lhorris, Iya and Dar

Being intentional about money management

Being intentional about studying and growing and learning

Being intentional about serving the church

Being intentional about overlooking offense

Being intentional about forgiveness

Being intentional about trust

Being intentional about restraining my tongue from speaking mindless, careless words

More great friends: Voica, Mel, Pinks and Owie

Being intentional about fearing the Lord and saying no to sin

Being intentional about telling people about Jesus and what He has done for us

Being intentional about discipleship and asking more mature women to speak into my life

Being intentional about sharing my life with people I love 

Being intentional about building with the next generation

Being intentional about my health, my body and my food

More great friends: Owie, Pat, Roel and Karla

Being intentional about what I read, watch, sing, say, think

Being intentional about enjoying life, celebrating each day and smiling amidst varied circumstances 

Being intentional to meditate on the Word every day

More great friends: Dar, Jay, Dennis and Voica

Being intentional about just doing what I need to do every day



When I was much younger, I didn't value intentionality as much. I could do what I wanted, if I wanted, when I wanted. Now I understand that I my time, finances, effort, love should be directed intentionally. It's kinda like walking the dart to the target to make sure nothing is wasted.



Being intentional requires being intentional!